Chunkybetty's Bits & Bob(by)s

Have your poppy and piss on it

2008-11-05T19:18:00.004Z

Yesterday's war memorial thieves certainly did.

Thanks to Tony F on Pinkstone's Blog for highlighting, once again, how depressingly disrespectful people are. The theft of five brass panels bearing the names of fallen soldiers from a memorial in Manchester beggars belief (well to those non-coppers who still hold a fuzzy sense of faith and happiness in the basic goodness of people).

The BBC article cites Philips Cemetary in Bradford. However, I doubt Bradford is in GMP's catchment area! so I suspect it's in Phillips Park in East Manchester.

The thefts are suspectedly in order to sell the plaques for cash, perhaps £300 each. All in time for Remeberance Sunday of course. If not returned, it will take £10,000 and many months to replace them. I think we should poppy pop the robbers off to the pen (permission to groan).

So I'll not worry too much about my bicycle seat that was missing presumed snaffled for cash when I arrived at the train station after work today... it's quite embarrasing walking with a bicycle through a crowded area with a bright yellow jacket on because you can't ride standing up!

The world is my beer fridge

2008-10-28T16:36:00.002Z

After such a long hot summer(!) There are some benefits to the sudden snowy turn in the weather. It's now that time of year again that I don't have to worry about making room in the fridge for my next cold beer or two...3...

I just bung them in my lovely walk-in fridge (otherwise known as the garden).

In case you wondered where I went (again)

2008-10-22T06:56:00.002Z

Teaching has started...lots of eager students(?)...12 hour days...melting

nuf said.

Has anyone seen a PhD around here anywhere coz I sure haven't?

In case you wondered where I went

2008-09-08T12:00:00.003Z

Firstly I got sucked well and truly into the Olympics, as can be seen from my half-arsed post on the first day, and nothing after. But for the second week of it I got food poisoning and didn't eat for 2 days...then I went on holiday, thankfully - I'd thought I'd have to cancel having been in bed (mostly) for a week. So now I'm back, and it's time to start doing some serious work again. So I'll be trying to catch up on all the blogs and start posting again (and doing some serious work of course).

CB

Olympics day one

2008-08-09T17:32:00.001Z

as it happened...set your alarm for 23:30 every day.

Britain tops the olympic medal table in '08

2008-08-07T18:29:00.003Z

1908 that is. Yep, I even resorted to stealing the BBC's joke this time.

Anyway, don't forget the Olympic games opening tomorrow night at 7. Apparently the pollution problems are "sorted" as extraordinary efforts have been made to ensure... at best not a danger to the health of athletes. That's nice then, what about the less fit and healthy spectators? Apparently it's fog, not pollution, so that's fine then, we just might not be able to see the games?

ed. I was only six hours out...

Blogs to watch (err, read)

2008-08-07T18:08:00.004Z

I just came across this blog on the BBC site which looks great. The author is trying to avoid using plastic for a month. I'm really into recycling as is Chunky - not that into it though - so I'm looking forward to following this one and seeing how it turns out.

I've also recently been introduced (shamelessly by the author himself) to this really witty, interesting and intelligent blog, so go read it if you haven't, and this is not because I was buttered up by an offer to link to my blog...OK.

More hope

2008-08-07T14:48:00.001Z

It looks like there's been some success in using patients own immune system to prevent organ transplants being rejected, rather than having to suppress the immune system by using drugs. Having to suppress the immune system must be more likely to mean infections and other illnesses can get hold easier, in addition to the side effects of the drugs themselves. Early days but promising.

Bullet Proof Bra

2008-08-05T16:26:00.004Z

A Policewoman in Germany has designed a bra to be worn under bullet-proof vest (and a shirt of course) as an alternative to normal underwired bras.

"The impact of a bullet can push the metal and plastic bits of the bra into an officer's body, causing serious injury"

This bra is like a sports bra and has no metal so will prevent that.

Good on 'er I say, Carmen Kibat (the woman who invented this). I mean from the picture they're not exactly attractive, but are sports bras ever? and they are optional, so I'm all for it. Here, have a ChunkyBetty Honours Degree in ingenuity.

Neither End Bites

2008-08-01T10:53:00.007Z

I thought you police peeps would have learned by now. Now listen carefully, all you have to do is remember this simple motto "Don't offend the offender"

How hard can it be?

"Police dog handlers have been told to consider whether criminals could be frightened of dogs before using them in raids or searches...'The traditional shout of "stand still or I will set the dog on you" will presumably now have to become "excuse me, my police dog is quite hairy and might cause alarm as he sinks his fangs into your right thigh -is that all right with you?" '"

Shave the dog, put a muzzle on it, and away you go, it won't be half as scary or dangerous, and no-one has to get sued. Simple.

The first ChunkyBetty Dunce Cap has now been plonked firmly on the head of whoever came up with that insightful cog in the masterplan. (Peter Vaughan perhaps?) They'll be able to use it to protect their bottoms from dog bites.

Photograph by Arthur Tress

Quote for today (is back!)

2008-07-30T17:58:00.001Z

How many times!!!

From the NPIA website:

"Using traditional processes when dealing with a drink driver, it is not

uncommon for a defendant's details to be written or typed up to 16

times before appearing in court. The introduction of mobile information

begins to reduce this enormous burden and with sustained long term

development will change the face of policing in the future."

Oh, and here's another one...

2008-07-25T15:27:00.001Z

Care of De-tec-tive

These ex-police officers are always getting into trouble,

oh sorry, article care of Dickiebo too, funny that, for some reason I looked at his blog after typing something about former police officers getting into trouble or something...can't quite put my finger on why...

Fixed Penalty 0001

2008-07-25T10:23:00.001Z

This guy has been fined for smoking in his van. I'm on his side, he doesn't carry passengers, and no-one else uses it.

"It not my place of work - I decorate houses not vans."

The benefits of global warming

2008-07-24T11:48:00.002Z

(Or as our youngest calls it - "global warning")

How lucky we are that the polar ice caps are melting, it makes it much easier for us to drill down and tap all the lovely oil and gas that's down there.

grr

Better safe than sorry

2008-07-24T11:41:00.003Z

I've seen the studies that say there's no evidence of mobile phone use causing cancer, but always wondered how long those studied lasted for, and what longer-term effects may be. This is basically giving us a warning that we should be careful, particularly where children are concerned, whose brains are still developing.

"A major six-year research study in the UK said last year that there
were no short-term adverse effects to brain and cell function from
mobile phone use.

However, the UK Mobile Telecommunications and Health Research
Programme said there was a "hint" of a higher cancer risk in the long
term and that its research would look into the effects over a 10-year
period.

"I am convinced that there are sufficient data to warrant issuing an
advisory to share some precautionary advice on cell phone use,"

Programme chairman Professor Lawrie Challis said: "We can't
rule out the possibility at this stage that cancer could appear in a
few years' time.""

Lock up your bunnies

2008-07-09T12:40:00.005Z

aww, poor bunnies. I only used to worry about foxes etc, now there's someone in Germany going round chopping their heads off, perhaps using something like Google Earth to find houses with hutches. Scary stuff!

I've decided to disguise mine, below are the before and after pictures...

Police imitators to be shot on sight

2008-07-09T12:26:00.001Z

No vehicles, task forces...it's like England then?

Sunsets for Dickiebo

2008-07-03T14:41:00.004Z

A nice view when you need a break from work.

Surveillance society

2008-06-19T13:21:00.001Z

Another step towards guilty until proven innocent?

I'll be visiting Sweden this summer, I'll try not to do anything intelligence...saying that I won't have fax or email, and you have to go to the top of the hill to get signal on your phone, so I should be ok.

Some hope?

2008-06-19T13:17:00.001Z

Too late for too many people to mention, but not too many to hold in our hearts.

The death of Professor Heinz Klein yesterday will be felt by many, and my heart goes out to them.

Today we may be a step closer to a cure, each of which helps, and hopefully brings some hope to those for whom cancer affects their lives.

No one bathes in Shijiayao

2008-06-18T16:45:00.001Z

Spare a thought for Shijiayao

"while visitors to Beijing amble along man-made lakes and fountains at
the grand Olympic Green and Olympic Forest Park, Shijiayao residents
will trek about 12 miles a day for drinking water"

No one bathes in quite a few residencies I can think of, but they do have a choice...

250 Weeks

2008-06-12T10:47:00.002Z

Now Chunky has hit her 250 weeks we've been starting to think what she might do afterwards, retirement not being retirement with a good few years of mortgage left. Though our options may be more limited as she's still suffering from an injury on duty, only time will tell.

I found this from Old Plod of Plympton really touching, from an outsiders point of view. I can't imagine what it's like to do 'the job' (and probably don't want to!) but little insights such as this help us MOPs to realise that a cop is for life, not just for Christmas.

I've reproduced the text below, but do go visit his site, it's heartfelt and humourous...don't forget about our Dickiebo though, who flies the flag with pride ;)

When Cops Retire
When a good cop leaves the "job" and retires to a better life, many are jealous, some are pleased and yet others, who may have already retired, wonder. We wonder if he knows what they are leaving behind, because we already know. We know, for example, that after a lifetime of camaraderie that few experience, it will remain as a longing for those past times. We know in the law enforcement life there is a fellowship which lasts long after the uniforms are hung up in the back of the closet. We know even if he throws them away, they will be on him with every step and breath that remains in his life. We also know how the very bearing of the man speaks of what he was and in his heart still is.

These are the burdens of the job. You will still look at people suspiciously, still see what others do not see or choose to ignore and always will look at the rest of the law enforcement world with a respect for what they do; only grown in a lifetime of knowing. Never think for one moment you are escaping from that life. You are only escaping the "job" and merely being allowed to leave "active" duty.

So what I wish for you is that whenever you ease into retirement, in your heart you never forget for one moment that "Blessed are the Peacemakers for they shall be called children of God," and you are still a member of the greatest fraternity the world has ever known.

Bobby duck

2008-05-30T13:55:00.003Z

While Chunky was convalescing, she brought me back this 'bobby duck'

How cute!

Pub Run

2008-05-27T13:06:00.001Z

Good news for anyone in training (or not) - beer is good for you!

I love the idea of the Midsummer Dream Footpath Race, a pub crawl with a twist, though I think I'd probably give up at the first pub and stay there!

Hello? Hello? Say thumbthing

2008-05-16T16:07:00.002Z

Speaks for itself really...

why not just hold a normal mobile, without letting everyone else know who you're talking to and what their number is.
You'd have missed the call by the time you put it on, and as the article says, you can't do too much wearing it (sorry to lower the tone but what if you need the loo?)

Astounding!

Lest we ever forget

2008-04-25T12:33:00.002Z

The longer I left it without blogging, the more I felt that I had to come up with something particularly profound or interesting to blog about. Suffice it to say I didn't manage.

But I've been thinking recently about those blogs that are forced to disappear (and I've ranted about this before). It still really bugs me that their freedom of speech is disallowed (especially under a pseudonym), and that we are denied the benefit of their writing.

So instead of my own profound thoughts (or lack thereof) I decided to refer you back to the expert's profundity; Belfast Peeler's last post, which still brings a tear to my eye.

Go and reread it even if you already have.

(Good Luck BP)

Back-office Policing

2007-12-06T19:45:00.000Z

Today's quote is again from the House of commons Select Committee Report on Police Reform:

"The Government's definition of 'front-line policing' as including work on case files and report preparation skews the statistics and gives an exaggerated impression of success in returning police officers to street duties. We recommend that the definition of 'front-line policing' should be changed to exclude time spent dealing with paperwork indoors." (2005)

If the definition were not changed to "exclude time spent dealing with paperwork indoors", we could happily say that all police work is front-line policing, satisfy all targets, and all get Special Priority Payments.

'Rise' up the ranks

2007-12-05T20:38:00.001Z

Today's quote is from the House of Commons Select Committee Fourth report on Police Reform (2005)

"We support the Government's intention to merge the pay and conditions
of police officers and staff. There should be a single police service
pay spine up which individuals will progress according to their skills
and expertise. The office of constable should be retained." ... and pay everyone peanuts.

I agree in principle with paying staff according to skills and ability, but I think that would involve a slight management reshuffle!

Building Communities, Beating Crime

2007-12-04T14:53:00.000Z

From the 2004 white paper:

"By 2008 – by cutting bureaucracy, improving science and technological support, and other reforms – we will have freed up the equivalent of 12,000 officers for front-line
duties"

"We are removing unnecessary burdens, scrapping unnecessary forms"

(p. 7)

Disappearing bloggers

2007-11-22T21:39:00.000Z

Because I've had two long periods without blogging, with just a short return in between, there seem to be so many police blogs that I used to read that have either disappeared completely or haven't been updated for months. It's just kinda depressing.

I know that there are lots of cases where officers have been found out and forced to stop blogging or worse. Particularly when the whole blog has disappeared it is as though it belittles that officer's experiences and their account of them. Those officers have invested a lot of time to let us know how hard they work in their jobs, the emotional effects of this and how they are attacked from both sides for and because they are doing their job and for and because they are not permitted to do it through constraints of accountability and paperwork. These are insightful and illuminating pieces of writing, written under freedom of speech and protected by copyright. Under these rights the individuals in question should be free to have their writing published wherever they wish under their pseudonym. Just like my disgust if ever I see the burning of books, the forced disappearance of these posts is a oppressive way of preventing the reader from choosing what they know and learn.

Its about time management (SMT/ACPO/Government) read these blogs with a view to seeing what the problems their (often frontline) officers are facing, and start to come up with real solutions, not brushing their issues under the carpet and moving those officers on who try to explain why everyone is tripping up over the huge mound in the middle of it.

When I say real solutions I mean long-term planned out answers to problems, not quick-fix keep the peace for five minutes patch-ups.

Anyway I don't know where that rant came from and to anyone who has just not blogged for a while because they're busy I know the feeling! But I just hope that those who are forced to stop blogging know there's a community of people online who feel for them and will miss them.

Blogging without obligation

2007-11-20T19:10:00.000Z

Thanks Dickiebo for introducing me to this. It's very interesting with regards to the power of users over their blogs and vice versa.

Elektra states "After coming across what seemed to be the 4000th or so post on someone's blog starting with "I'm sorry I haven't posted in awhile." I decided it is time to rethink what makes a good blog and the expectations that have come to be part of it. I am thinking that no one should utter those words again . . .and with that thought I give you Blogging Without Obligation"

Blogs and social software are hailed as giving the user more power over webpages, opening up the possibility for the non-technical to create and maintain sites and to interact with other internet users, but in her post Elektra shows that along with the fame having a 'good blog' brings, it also brings some obligations and expectations, which is in danger of turning and enjoyable hobby into a tying chore, and reducing the quality of posts and thus the blog itself.

So when I don't post for a month it's to keep the quality up...ok?...any takers...

Wow, a month without posting!

2007-11-16T13:03:00.000Z

Doing a PhD and being a graduate teaching assistant is hard work! I'm settling into it now though and am less nervous before each teaching session and less tired after it - partly because I feel a bit more like I know what I'm talking about.

Because I'm more relaxed I feel like I can actually start doing something about the PhD because its really just been teaching up to now. I'm really glad to be getting the teaching experience though even if it takes away some research (and blogging) time, one of my colleagues said that doing a PhD is extremely lonely so I'll be glad to have that social teaching side (though I might not always think that when I have tight deadlines!).

Things may be looking up for Chunky too, she's got an interview next week (eek!)

Spread the Word and Sign up

2007-10-14T14:11:00.000Z

Men and women, we really need to spread the word about this pay gap, and help to do something about it.

"The pay gap is a rip-off equivalent of men getting paid all year and women working for free from October 30th.

With women working full-time paid 17% less an hour than men on average, women’s work is being discounted scandalously."

Sign the petition, write to your local newspaper, or join or organise a Women's No Pay Day Campaign event

Post dissertation clear out

2007-10-12T17:37:00.001Z

In response to Frances Blog and Facebook question - not any more hahaha! :)

Yesterday...

Messy desk

Today!

Tidy desk!!

My first response was to step 1:

"Clear the clutter. Instead of incrementally sorting through your drawers and desktop, start by dumping the lot somewhere else and only allowing the important things back."

There's a big pile of cds, papers, wires, floppy disks!?! on the floor to the left of me, does that defeat the object (not to mention the windowsil) ah well, I've got room for more piles of paper now :)

Still messy sil :(

ps. methinks the desktop could do with a looking at next, can never find anything!
It's been worse mind...

Ahhhhh :)

2007-10-09T17:19:00.000Z

Sorry for not posting for so long, I've been working veeerry hard on my dissertation - just finished printing it :)

then I deleted 2,700 emails from my yahoo account that I have collected over about 3 years, it feels kinda strange, I'm definitely an email hoarder, eek!

I'll post a link to my dissertation as soon as I've anonymised a particular force I mention.

Betty

'Potato and Meat 'pies

2007-09-15T21:28:00.000Z

In continuation of my previous rant, I also want to mention 'potato and meat' pies - whatever happened to the good, old-fashioned meat & 'tater. Why does potato have to come first because there's more of it, I know it's helpful on ingredients labels (and scary sometimes) but why mess with the name, we've been eating meat and tater pies for hundreds of years, well not me personally...anyway, I don't know of any way to eat a hot sloppy meat and tater pie without a fork - tried today, it was gorgeous but kinda messy and singed fingers etc...mmm pastry; worth it :)

Future contenders:

Chips & fish
Chips, pudding and gravy
Squeak & bubble
Mash & sausage
Chow mein chicken

I'm getting hungry...

Don't commit crime

2007-09-13T17:51:00.000Z

That ought to work, why didn't they think of it sooner?

Most of these daft messages we have to have on everything nowadays is more of an arse covering exercise because of the 'I'm gonna sue' culture. Just like in the 'common sense is dead' post where the woman successfully sues for spilling hot coffee on herself (and my idea about the conditioner bottle). I'm sure I'd be very good at nitpicking the inaccuracies in a lot of things because I'm so logical like that, but I can't bring myself to add to the insanity (I can use that word, I looked it up; 'extreme foolishness', so ner!!), even for financial gain.

We're all treading on politically correct eggshells (no eggs were harmed in the making of this post), having to be careful about every word we say.

In my questionnaires, 90% of Police agreed that too many people use email to cover their backs, and 87% said they had to word them carefully in case they were forwarded.

It all comes down to where you draw the line, "warning...may contain nuts" on something that is nut-free but prepared in the same environment where nuts are prepared is fine, on a packed of nuts it is insulting peoples' intelligence. Carefully wording an email in case it offends staff or a member of the public is fine, having to worry about complaining to a friend about a difficult shift (as everyone has from time to time), well it just means email can't be used to keep in emotional contact with and get the support from friends and colleagues you might not get to see very often, surely this reduces officer morale. One of my comments says "I've stopped sending e-mails to colleagues wingeing about work etc as I've heard recently that our division is thinking about monitoring e-mails"; sometimes everyone needs a good winge, as evidenced in all the blogs in the sidebar and hundreds of others.

However, it seems that some people's intelligence needs insulting, though I don't know who's worse, those that try to sue because their coffee is hot and MacDonald's made them fat, or those that let them win. If they were never successful they wouldn't keep trying.

Soon we'll need signs everywhere saying 'don't commit crime', this will happen about the same time as someone is successfully let off because they weren't told not to (commit crime). These companies were silly to assume that people didn't know that their coffee was hot of their food was fattening, so who says it won't be the Police next who should have known better than to assume that ignorance of the law is no defence against it.

The spokeswoman in the article is right though when she says "If stating the obvious helps to reduce crime or has any impact at all we will do it...[w]e are not saying it is going to stop hardened criminals, but it may make someone who is nervous think twice."

I don't really know anything about actual Policing, is it the case that ignorance is becoming more of a defence? Is this part of why everything has to be so politically correct, stating the obvious in as many languages as possible?

Reassuringly Stella

2007-09-05T19:19:00.000Z

"Pass on something good", have a Stella instead

Need I say more?

Brilliant comment that from Wan Crarker - a contender for a mention in dispatches Dickiebo?

Personally I quite like Stella but can't mix it with any other lager without being ill, and it's too strong to drink all evening, so I don't have it very often.

Ok I did say more, but I didn't need to, for any nitpickers.

Fair Pay

2007-09-02T16:39:00.001Z

We're all signed up. You don't have to be in the Police to support fair pay. It's not fair that they can't join a trade union or go on strike. Over a barrel?...

Stress

2007-08-29T19:02:00.000Z

In relation to David Copperfield's post today 'On Combat'. Here's an excerpt from a paper on stress in the Police, this time from Canada. It would be longer but you can't copy and paste from it ho hum...

Physical Evidence of Police Officer Stress

"The results...demonstrate that police officers experience both physical and psycho-social stress on the job, anticipating stress as they go about their work, while suffering anticipatory stress at the start of each shift. The results demonstrated that the highest levels of stress occur just prior to and during critical incidents, and that officers do not fully recover from that stress before leaving their shift. Overall, the results illustrate the need to consider stress reactivity and repressors in the assessment of police officer stress wile clearly demonstrating the need for debriefing after critical incidents and increased training in stress management and coping strategies" (Anderson, Litzenberger & Plecas, Policing: An International Journal of Police Strategies & Management, 2002:399).

If anyone wants a copy of the whole thing please email me because it's only accessible through my uni passwords and I'll get into all copyright troubles etc if I post it or attach it anywhere.

Results

2007-08-27T15:19:00.000Z

Hi, I've posted some results on the Police Communication site, I can't stratify them into ranks, but as 77% of respondents were PCs I think we can safely say these are the general views of PCs (those who read blogs at least!).

These general views being that yes - you get too many emails, most of which are irrelevant, and therefore very, very annoying...you didn't need me to tell you that did you!

Would you step in?

2007-08-21T20:51:00.000Z

There's a poll on the daily mail today 'Would you step in if you saw somebody being attacked?'

I don't think it's a yes/no answer that can be selected that easily, it would depend on the circumstances. I really don't know if I could though, and not for fear of being prosecuted as many of the comments say on the related article, I don't think that's something you think about in the heat of the moment. Basically I would be afraid of what the attacker would do to me. I would feel better if we lived in a society where people would back each other up against the attacker and hold him until the Police arrive. But what if there's no-one else around? I suppose in those cases you must ring the Police first so they know where you are, or they might be looking for two dead bodies!

I think some people are using the related article to complain about the fact that the innocent are prosecuted and the criminals go free, as I say, I wouldn't think about that at the time. It's true though, and we need an excuse to voice this complaint - here's a perfect excuse, it's completely astoundingly, unbelievably disgusting what that bastard got away with (and I'm sure he's not the only one).

Just think about how much courage it took that woman to stand up in court against the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with at one point. Think about how many people haven't got friends who will alert the Police. Think about all the Police time wasted for a fine that won't even make a dent. Just like the attackers in the first story, criminals are being allowed to think they can get away with things without being punished - and it seems often they can, no matter how hard the Officer on the street (when they get the chance) tries.

Grammar

2007-08-21T14:41:00.000Z

Starting a sentence with 'but' in my last post reminded me of a great quote from linguist Naomi Baron - it took me a few seconds to get the whole thing ;)

"My composition teachers railed against using contractions, beginning a sentence with a conjunction, or ending one with a preposition in a written text, acts which were permissible in speech. (But obviously, these were suggestions I didn't always listen to.)"

I don't know if I'd have the guts to joke in an academic paper!

Acronyms

2007-08-21T14:20:00.000Z

Just found out Chunky is an ABC SPOC, she knows no-one has time and they're all made up, she remembers the old beeping box, and the pens, barcodes and clipboard. She doesn't remember that I'm not in the Police and have no idea what half of the things she says to me mean!! Well I did get this one actually because of the comments on PC Southwest's post. But the Police are full of acronyms.

The NHS is just as bad. I've changed this slightly but I'm quite sure you could have got a letter to my department just by putting:

MHU
PGH
AUM

on the envelope!

In my induction (how many months after I started!!) they warned us against using too many acronyms. We were told the story of (a different Trust of course) where someone had written DOA and the date in the margin of a patient's notes meaning 'date of admission'. It was an unfortunate nurse who got the call from the relative asking how the patient was doing, to which she broke the news that he was 'dead on arrival'.

I'm gonna be rich!

2007-08-17T11:20:00.000Z

I'm back on my 'world's gone mad' view (suffering from a mental illness sorry) where everything's PC and it's the words that are important not the meaning behind them (remind you of the promotion crammer?)

Looking at my conditioner bottle in the shower today it said ' use with [insert own brand name here] shampoo for best results'. If I write to them and say "well I've found I get best results using it with dum-de-dum brand shampoo and unless you can prove you have tested every possible combination of shampoos and found yours is the best I want a settlement of £1 million in my bank account a week next Tuesday or I'll sue you for misleading me for all the time I've been using the two together (two washes) when I could have been using cheaper and better dum-de-dum brand. This has cost me 37p I needn't have spent and two days of marginally less shiny hair and I am deeply affected by this."

Do you think I'd get anywhere?

Two Eye Openers

2007-08-16T13:55:00.000Z

Everyone should read this, particularly if you're not a Police Officer. Of course, I knew Policing was nothing like the Bill, but North East Policeman's post is a fantastically written look into the real world of Policing, and that's only a tiny fraction of the sort of things they and not to mention the kids have to deal with.

There are 'unofficial' Police blogs full of these heart-wrenching experiences Officers have to deal with. ACPO and the like should spend less time trying to close down these blogs and more time actually reading them. Then they might start to get the slightest idea what these guys are going through and why they complain about all the bureaucratic red tape stopping them from doing real Policing.

It's interesting to note that both the posts I've linked to above say they don't mind doing the paperwork (in triplicate) if they've actually been able to make a difference; it's all the other stuff that gets in the way.

Top Ten Comments

2007-08-14T18:38:00.000Z

Due to the success of the questionnaires - (thank you!) I've created a comment of the day section on the wiki - here are the top ten comments so far.

1. Because of email … Communication between officers and the SMT is more strained.

I've never seen any communication between officers and SMT

2. People sometimes get left out of important email communications.

Good

3. Because of email … Too much irrelevant information is sent, wasting my time

I once had a e-mail, stating that less e-mails are to be sent

4. Too many people here use email to cover their backs

No understand question.

5. Because of email … Too much irrelevant information is sent, wasting my time

Could'nt give a toss if Jane from comms support is having a 40th birthday bash at the Horse and Cart friday night, to name one of many.

6. I am careful how I word email messages for fear they will be forwarded.

And don't send one when you are angry at 0530 in the morning, gets you in lot of smelly stuff

7. I receive many email messages not related to my work.

After a month off last year i had received 450 e-mails. 12 had relevance to me

8. Every now and then, an email message will infuriate me

More often than that

9. Because of email … I feel closer to my boss.

He e-mails me from the next office!

10. Because of email …Many trivial issues come to the attention of higher management

...and often misconstrued, requiring further emails to clarify nonsensical points of no real importance.

CS Spray

2007-08-13T18:49:00.000Z

Apparently now it's un-pc to say CS gas, due to a complaint from a Jewish citizen. We now have to say CS spray, fair enough but this seems like another example of the 'world gone mad'. In my view, people who say un-pc things are usually not doing it to offend, they're usually not even aware it could possibly offend e.g Nitty Gritty and Black Maria. Anyone wanting to offend isn't going to consider or care either way about the 'pc-ness' of what they say.

Then again, apparently it's not a gas so who are we to talk...the world's still gone mad though (am I allowed to say that??!!)

Ashfordly Police Station: Communications technology is bad for you!

2007-08-12T14:13:00.000Z

This post has links to more about email and communication technology.

Ashfordly Police Station: Communications technology is bad for you!

Thank you!

2007-08-12T11:38:00.000Z

My sincerest thanks to PC David Copperfield for posting about my research, the results are coming in fast already. And thanks to everyone for filling the questionnaires in.

Betty

R.I.P. Common sense.

2007-08-11T11:18:00.000Z

If felt the need to reproduce the text of this rather than just linking to it. It isn't mine, I got it from totallyun-pc's blog, who reproduced it by permission of others. I haven't asked permission but it's just gotta be spread - I agree with the comment about putting it on notcie boards. What about stapling it to certain people's foreheads?

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, as his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion, his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To blame and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not join the majority and do nothing.

"the preceding blog is not mine, I didn't make it up, and Google shows it has been reproduced thousands if not millions of times, but in the sad sad memory to all our friends and colleagues, and anyone else who has become a victim of our times.... I say blog it in memoriam to us all."posted by totallyun-pc at Friday, February 16, 2007

Ps. I know this blog is turning into a collection of others' posts, I'm reading back over older posts at the moment and some of them can't be allowed to be lost in the ether.

Betty

Surplus school places

2007-08-11T11:07:00.000Z

This is brilliant, though I thought the better idea would be to keep the school places as they are and put the prisoners in them, that'll be far more humiliating and keep the teachers in jobs. I don't evny them though - mind you it probably wouldn't be much worse than what they have to deal with now.

You're nicked!: I've found the answer

Organisation??

2007-08-10T10:55:00.001Z

And I didn't use the word organisation anywhere...

Police Communication (Updated)

2007-08-09T12:44:00.000Z

I've returned to my long neglected blog with a new slant. This blog is now mainly about police communication, mainly ;)

Chunky is a Police Sergeant, Betty is a student researching the Police (that's me), Chunky finally learnt what blogs are, having read PC David Copperfield's book, 'Wasting Police Time', but never gets to go on the computer anymore because I'm always on it...

I'd been made aware by Chunky and friends that email use was considered a problem amongst some officers, so for my MSc research I requested that a questionnaire be sent out for the mutual benefit of me as a researcher and the force in question, to help identify and try to remedy the problems and pressures being felt by officers.

Unfortunately my request was declined, partly through my own lack of prior discussion with the force. However, I feel that the comment; "[w]e have to be quite protective given the amount of emails that our staff receive" in the final email I recieved shows to a certain degree that my belief that I could help the force in question has not been considered, whilst simultaneously showing that there is indeed a problem.

I would like to thank all Police Officers who visited this blog's sister wiki Police Communication and completed the questionnaires. The results are now in and the raw percentages are available on the wiki, plus the best comments from Officers. To protect my future research I have decided not to post the full dissertation until a later date.

Tomato Chutney

2006-12-03T15:40:00.000Z

Mum wants to make tomato chutney from her tomatoes before they go off (perhaps they don't last for ever in plastic bags after all). Here are three out of the 275,000!!! hits on google. Not picked for any particular reason except for the first coz mum likes Floyd.

Floyd Green Tomato Chutney

Ingredients
15g/½oz root ginger
8-10 chillies
2kg/4lb green tomatoes, chopped
500g/1lb apples, peeled, cored and chopped
250g/8oz raisins, chopped
625g/1¼lb shallots, chopped
2 tsp salt
500g/1lb brown sugar
570ml/1 pint malt vinegar

Method
1. Bruise the ginger and tie in a muslin bag with the chillies.
2. Place all the other ingredients in a preserving pan and suspend the muslin bag among them.
3. Bring to the boil, stirring until the sugar has dissolved, and simmer until the desired consistency is reached.
4. Remove the muslin bag. Pour into warmed sterilised jars, cover and label.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/database/greentomatochutney_8201.shtml

Foody Red Tomato Chutney

Makes: 1.8kg (4lb)

2.7kg (6lb) RipeTomatoes
450g (1lb) Onions
350g (12oz) Sugar
300ml (½ pint) Malt Vinegar
25g (1oz) Salt
2 tsp Paprika
¼ tsp Cayenne Pepper

Wash and chop the tomatoes, peel and chop the onions.
Place the tomatoes and onions into a heavy bottomed saucepan, cook gently to release the tomato juices, simmer for 20 - 30 minutes until tender.
Add the salt, paprika, cayenne and half of the vinegar, cook gently for 45 minutes or until it begins to thicken.
Add the sugar and remaining vinegar, stirring until fully dissolved.
Continue simmering, until the mixture becomes thick, stirring occasionally.
Leave for 3 - 5 weeks to allow the flavour to mature

http://thefoody.com/preserves/redtomatochutney.html

Hookery Cookery

Apple and Tomato Chutney

Description/Notes:

A nice fruity chutney with a hint of ginger

Ingredients:

· 1 onion, skinned and finely chopped

· 1 lb. (450g) sultanas

· 1 lb. (450g) apples, cut small

· 1 lb. (450g) tomatoes, skinned and chopped

· 1 pint (570ml) vinegar

· half a teaspoon of ground ginger

· half a teaspoon of pepper

· 1lb. (450g) Demarara sugar

Cooking Instructions:

Boil the Demarara sugar in the vinegar until dissolved
Add the other ingredients and simmer gently for about 1 hour or until mixture is turned to pulp
Spoon into clean, hot jars then seal and label

http://www.hookerycookery.com/pickle001.htm

I hope these are easy to print

Betty

Fresher Tomatoes

2006-11-26T14:12:00.000Z

I recently brought some tomatoes home from my mum's plants in one of her Ziploc bags. We ate most of them but for some reason there was one left for ages...and ages - it seemed to last forever! While store bought ones in an open plastic tray slowly went softer and redder and a bit gross (thankfully Chunky is happy with her new composter and doesn't worry about wasting food anymore).

Being an academic I can't just say "store your tomatoes in ziploc bags for freshness" - anyway, that's the point of the bags isn't it? However, this seems to go beyond the normal extra ziploc freshness (other sandwich bags are available ;) Just in case my mum's organic tomatoes are of super genetic breeding I best do a control study, some in bags some out, refrain from eating them to see if they really do last forever...well I probably won't but I don't want anyone thinking I haven't thought about it :)

Betty

Too soon for Easter?

2006-11-21T16:35:00.000Z

It's amazing what you can find when researching corporate blogs. The CadburySchweppes company has a graduate blog for prospective and current employees. One employee Joe (17 August 06) says that one of the questions he gets asked most (apart from the obvious UmpaLumpa ones) "is why we don't produce a Crème Egg the size of an Easter egg", something I've always wondered. He links to a great project of someone who has, check it out!